The Color of Nonentity

You know that sort of sorrow can attack you suddenly?
Sure you know, but am not as sure as this if we're talking about how you feel it.
No need to repeat, I don't know exactly why am talking here, but, like I always do, I talk.
I felt that sorrow yesterday, I felt like am in another aura of being. Just like this, without reasons. I felt like am not as "complete" as I should, not as "good" as I should.
Why? How "complete" or "good" should I be? Why should I be complete or good, why am asking myself to be so? I don't know. Really I don't know.
Or, maybe I'd know.
I'd know if it not as solid as we used to consider things; one reason leads to the cosmic werewolf we all feel deep down. If you said it's just a complex of things crushed together, is some way you can never know exactly, so I'd agree.
You may be noticed that tome of irony when I said "just a complex". Yes, I meant it, cause if you ever recognized that formula, you'll never really understand its mechanics. How could it work with that delicate way eating up the human race's will and soul with such great success.
They are tiny little viruses marching like a Nazi army into you soul. Some things you could never believe it'll be some bricks building up your palace of distinguish. Some tiny little things like an eye look, a word, a line you've heard in a drama or you've red in a book. Scenes you'd see in your usual way going to somewhere. Know that there's a time those tiny little goblins would show up their ugly faces, as one solid compound to make you life like nothing.
Yes, you can feel this innocent feeling of despair. You'd never avoid it as long as you're living. You really don't know why. Then you really don't know how.